– Bill, have you got a minute?
– Sure, Fred, what's up?
– You had your lawn mowed yesterday, right?
– Yes, that's right. Why?
– Well, the person who mowed your lawn dumped all the grass cuttings on my driveway.
– I can't believe that, Fred.
– I got a picture taken. My daughter did it with her mobile phone. Look!
– Well, where are the grass cuttings now?
– Why? Do you want them back?
– Don't be ridiculous. It just looks like you had your lawn mowed recently, too. Perhaps it was your own grass cuttings on your driveway.
– Now who's being ridiculous!?! I mow my lawn, and I compost my grass cuttings.
– I don't know. It sounds like the time you said my wife and I got our car washed on your driveway. You came home to find the hose out and the driveway full of soap. You shouted that we were thieves, stealing your water and soap. You demanded that we pay you back.
– Well, how was I to know that my daughter had washed her car and not cleaned up after herself?
– Yes, but instead of thinking logically, you stormed over here to accuse us.
– Ok, ok, but you're not Mr. Innocent either. Remember last winter when you got your sidewalk shoveled, and the neighbor's boy forgot the last section near our sidewalk? You said that because I was jealous of your clean sidewalk, I had collected some snow and put it there just to bug you.
– It's just like you, Fred, to keep a list of grievances.
– Look who's talking, Bill!?! You remember everything everyone ever did to you. You're the one who's always bringing up old grievances.
– Me!?! I'm always ready to forgive and forget.
– Forgive and forget? You? That's a joke!
– Oh, really? Remember when your son loved playing baseball? My living room windows got broken regularly. Did I make a fuss? No, I just asked you to replace the glass. Today, when I see your son, I never speak of it.
– That's very generous of you, Bill. I suppose it's the same way I don't speak about all the times your son rode his bike on my lawn, damaging my grass, even after I repeatedly asked him not to.
– You and your lawn! It's like a love affair.
– Takes one to know one!
– Enough already! Listen, Fred, about bowling night ... it's your turn to drive.
– My turn! Last time you had your car waxed in the morning. You said you didn't want to get it dirty in the outdoor parking lot. So, I drove.
– What are you, nuts? That was the time before. Last time.
- you had your lawn mowed
- mowed your lawn
- grass cuttings
- I got a picture taken
- mow my lawn
- just to bug you
- list of grievances
- forgive and forget
- takes one to know one
- you had your car waxed